By way of introduction, I am a generic adult female. Really, if you know that, you know lots about me already. I’m just another face in the crowd of humanity—a person you see in the next car, waiting for the same red light to turn green. The person behind you in the grocery store, buying, perhaps, the same brand of toilet paper with the same store coupon cut out of the circular in the newspaper. Waiting in the line for the drive-thru ATM, getting a dental cleaning in the next cubicle over at the dentist office, browsing through the discount books at Barnes and Noble. A person not worth noting, unless I am wearing my orange “Weird” Al T-shirt and then only because you might wonder who the long-haired guy in the blue circle is and why is this bland woman wearing a shirt with him on it.
Mostly I answer to “Mom!” Very rarely do people, even my own husband, use my name. And there are five people that call me “Mom!!??” so that’s what I’ve been accustomed to. But so many of my gender answer to that name, that it is a generic term. I’m just one of millions. But I refuse to be called “dude” so “MOM!!!” will have to do.
Actually, I do answer to another, more specific, version of that name, that of “Katie’s Mom.” My 14-year-old’s friends call me that. I was wandering around the acreage of the local SuperTarget, when I heard someone shout, “Hi, Katie’s Mom!” It was Katie’s friend and Declam Dramatic Duo partner, Dan. He also shouted out the greeting when he saw me on the sidewalk, watching Katie, Dan and the rest of the 8th grade band march in the Memorial Day Parade. (My own daughter didn’t even shout hello.) But it doesn’t lend any kind of specificness to me, other than I am the mother of this particular girl named Katie.
On a message board that I frequent, my signature line is “We are all unique.” I like that phrase for its seemingly paradoxical statement. So even if I get the urge to be pleased with myself for a stunning accomplishment, hidden talent, witty saying, or clever understanding, the fact that other people are special as well negates any feeling of superiority. Every person on this earth has qualities than make them different from others. So by being different, we are all the same. Show me a person who is exactly like someone else, and I’ll show you an anomaly.
Now, as a member of the Chubby Girl Brigade, I must point out that, yes, I am “generously proportioned” (a quote from a book, or rather, series of books, that I will probably be mentioning a lot—books by Alexander McCall Smith, the first of which is The No. 1 Ladies’ Detective Agency). I am pear-shaped (mmmm, pears) and I like food, especially chocolate (the more I reveal about myself, the more you see how generic I am). I don’t plan to stop liking food or chocolate any time soon and I have managed to overcome my urge to diet. Hooray for the Chubby Girls!
Email me at genadfemale at chubbygirlbrigade dot com
Generic Adult Female's Posts:
* Tops and Bottoms
* I'm Not Fat, I'm Big-Boned
* I Feel Pretty, Oh So Pretty!
* "Fat" Does Not Equal "Weak"
* You Are What You Eat -- Cover Me In Chocolate Please
* Empowerment Is A Real Buzz
* Meandering Thoughts
* Twistin The Night Away
* What Not To Say
* No I Did Not Get The Part
* A Long-winded Book Review
* Gratuitous Olympic Article
* Grin And Bare Them
* A Period Piece
* Playing Around
* A Rubber Maid Container
* Boys I Have Loved
* October Time For Scary Stories
* October Scary Stories -- Continued
* What Are You Wearing For Halloween
* I Want Candy
* Kirby? That's Not A Name, That's A Vacuum Cleaner!
* Wracking My Brain, It Wracks Back, And Then I Throttle It
* Leftover Taco Meat
* GAF's Fat Chance Thanksgiving
* The Body Spray coveted by the CGB
* What a Generic Chubby Girl Wants For Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanzaa/Winter Solstice/Her Birthday
* Doctor, Doctor Give Me The News
* Attack Of The Killer Music Stand
* TV stands for Thin Voluptuosity
* Changes Aren't Afoot
* Over The Shoulder Boulder Holders
* Happiness Is A Warm Bun